A voicehearer’s path ~

Archive for the ‘children’ Category

Fearfulness ~

New Studies

The  upshot of these studies really, is that we are not sure which comes first, the fear, or the conservatism. I remember when I became a Democrat, a buddy and I had taken off from Indiana, looking to build our lives in California, wrong timing, and a bunch of other factors brought us ultimately back to Indiana. But, in the aftermath of that adventure, my politics had changed. Now, when I look at the whole incident, the “adventure”, and it’s subsequent failure should have made me more fearful, i.e. more conservative.

But the major lesson this particular adventure had taught me, was to choose love first. Now, looking back, I fearcannot honestly say how that lesson came through, or even “stuck”, I just know that fear, which was the precursor to that adventure, did not work, and was not a path to travel. I guess I do know how that lesson “stuck”.

But, now comes the kicker, love and fear are opposites. You cannot choose to love and live in fear. It will not happen. Love, and by this I mean all manner of love, whether you are speaking of love of one person or love of all mankind cannot come out of fear, nor will it manifest as fear. To choose to Love, truly, in the sense of having compassion for oneself and all others will manifest itself in the positive; joy, peace, patience, gentleness, goodness, kindness, humility, and self-control. To be sure, I am not perfect in this, not by a long shot. But, I continue to learn.

I am often at odds with Paul the Apostle, who is the original writer of the above litany of the manifestations of love, but, like Paul, I have many fears, and those fears sometimes take a great deal of prayer, journey2self-examination, faith in the Master of the Universe, and time to conquer. It is both a very good thing that Paul’s letters were included in the New Testament, and a very bad thing that they are there. The good, of course, is that we can watch a very human individual, a murderer, no less, come to terms with his imperfections and find solace in the love of God. The very bad thing is that, if you do not read Paul’s letters as a journey toward love, you see them as a mandate on how humans are supposed to conduct themselves as believers. That will result in a horrible lack of growth, for his letters were not a manifest, but a record of a journey from human failing to learning to love at the highest level. In fact, the entire Bible is very much about such a journey, not for just one person, but for an entire nation.

That, indeed, is why, though the original laws written in the Torah were an excellent starting point, they were remiss in that they did not list a group of heinous crimes that we have, finally, grown enough to see as the wicked crimes they are, i.e. slavery, rape, and child harm. All three of those can be listed together as what one could call “power” crimes, in that their entire force is to hold power over others. It was not until the later prophets that one began to see that “compassion” was first, last, and always, the way to please God. Compassion will not manifest itself with slavery, rape, or harming children. It will, indeed, manifest itself in Dalai Lamakindness toward all other humans. Truly, we are a long way from manifesting this as a people. Some humans have arrived, and speak to us about this, for instance we see the Dalai Lama, leader of the Buddhist faith, speak often about the fact that compassion is a human need, not necessarily a religious tenet. He is right.

We humans, if we are going to grow from childhood to adulthood, must grow in compassion, living our lives in fear gets us “stuck” in childhood. We will continue to be militant, angry, suffering humans if we do not learn to manifest love from the first of our interactions, to the last of our lives. We need to learn as a people, to choose love first.

 

Murk ~

Murky-FoggyGod does not see into the murkiness of our souls. I have held this view for many years, and every horrible thing that happens, from school shootings to genocidal events confirms this for me. I have even had debates with my fellow believers on this subject as they insist that the “Almighty” can see whatever the Holy Presence looks at. But, therein lies the rub. We were given free will. If the Ancient One interferes with that, it is not free will. But that means that in this world in which we live and move and have our being, there will be horrible atrocities that are completely unexplainable if you believe that God has set the Holy Presence as some sort of GameMaster.  That isn’t how it works, obviously, or 26 people would not have died at Newtown, many of them children under the age of 7.

Do I believe God called these children home? Well, I believe that God opened his arms to receive them when they were sent home by a  madman. Is that the same thing? I don’t think so. I, personally, believe that the only way such an atrocity, such a heinous act, could have been prevented was to restrict and enforce that restriction of the sale of such guns. I know, I will be told by those who believe in gun freedom that the law breakers will get their hands on them anyway. Maybe. Murders with firearms, are down in many countries, the only countries ahead of us on this scale are war torn, at best. We need to admit that we are not first (I know, GASP!) and look at their laws and adapt such laws to our nation.

But, getting back to this thing about the murkiness of the soul, and God’s not looking into that murk. I believe the ancient laws of Moses were given so that we could know some of the causes of murkiness andopenbible find the way to be more pure of heart and mind. Now, do I believe that list was complete? No! Do I believe that list was correct? Well, for the most part, but there were things that needed much longer explanations, or just not mention them. Do I believe the Bible was inspired? Sort of. You see, to me, Moses may have had more visionary instruction than dictated instruction. That would lead to wordiness where succinctness would have sufficed, and succinctness where more verbiage would have helped. And, I believe that all inspiration comes through our very faulty filters, in which case, no matter how much God tries to tell us what we need to know, if we are not clear enough to see it, we won’t get the lesson. I don’t care how powerful you believe God is, and I personally believe God to be more powerful than anyone is capable of imagining. If you have not gone through a clearing process, you will not see or hear any instructions you are supposed to see and hear.

Dalai LamaIf, in fact, we were all clear enough to see and hear the best instructions from the High One, there would be a world of people like Buddha and Jesus. I don’t think we’re there yet. I think we are much more inclined to be like a sieve, where some of the holes are blocked, and some are clear, where we hear, we may, indeed, hear with great clarity, but where the holes are blocked, we don’t even see that there’s a problem. And, there’s another issue. Many times what we do hear is for us, not the congregation, and we think this light we’ve just been given must surely be shared. That has lead to some incredible confusion. The only “‘sharing” of light that we are to consistently do is to be compassionate toward each other, to forgive perceived wrongs, and to be responsible for our acts and words so as not to hurt others unnecessarily in our quest for higher living.

Abortion~

I am not an advocate of abortion being used as a means of contraception. But I am an advocate for a woman being allowed to make her own choice regarding abortion. There is a reason for that. Though the fetus can and does develop cell memory, and can remember, therefore, being in the uterus, the spirit does not enter the body until the first breath is taken. Therefore, one is not committing murder until there is a living child.

There is a sense of the sacred with all of life, which is why I don’t necessarily believe that abortion should be any kind of wholesale answer to unwanted pregnancy. BUT, there are so many circumstances that call for the necessity of abortion for the sake of the sanity of the mother; too many children already living, the pregnancy being the result of forced sexual encounters (i.e. rape, and yes, if it’s forced on her, it’s rape, legitimate and real, no matter the means of the forcing!), whether the mother’s health will tolerate a full term pregnancy, the health of the growing fetus, yes, and there are other reasons abortion needs to remain an option for women in the prime of their lives.

I want to be clear as I can be that I do not consider this any kind of political issue. This should, first, last and always remain between a woman and her Doctor!  This should not be the choice of the Doctor, it should be his or her job to give clear and concise answers to the woman’s questions so that the woman can come to her own conclusions. We are talking about the woman’s body, therefore, whether to abort or carry the life within should be her choice.

I do NOT want politicians in this equation in any way. Most specifically because most politicians are male. No male has even a modicum of ability to understand the stresses of pregnancy and as they do not have the responsibility for carrying the fetus, they should not usurp the responsibility for the life of the fetus.

Then, there is the question of the life of the child once it is born. This is so completely disregarded by the politicians for whom an extra person in existence is just another vote. There is so little consideration for the health and well-being of the children on this planet that bringing in more is a question all responsible parents ask. Those who are that responsible generally practice some form of birth control, when they have a choice regarding sexual encounters. This should never have come into the political arena, and should be taken out of the political arena for the sake of all concerned! Only when we balance all factors can we consider ourselves to have reached any level of civilization.

Children

I have been watching SVU again. And, yes I know it’s fiction, but the producers are reminding us that perverts are out there. I think what sickens me most is that these guys think their actions are “normal”. How can they think that an action that requires the drugging of a victim is “normal”? The entire premise that children are forced to deal with an adult on any kind of sexual level is “normal” is enough to make a truly normal person vomit!

One of the things that says that we as human beings have grown in our understanding of what is right or wrong is that the ancient sacred texts did not even recognize rape of women and children as something that is so heinous that it should be punished. This is what must be brought to the attention of those who wave the Bible or any other sacred text around as a marker of how we should live in the here and now.

Consent, or even the ability to give consent should be the marker we look for in what we consider permissable in our actions with others. If the person you want to do anything with is not old enough or intelligent enough or indeed free to give consent to interacting with you, you arein the wrong place, committing a morally wrong action!

If you want to exert complete control of a situation, you are most likely going to find yourself in the wrong if it involves another person. One of the most sacred gifts our creator has given us is free will. If your actions take that free will from another human, you are doing something that is completely and totally wrong. I am well aware that this is not recognized in the ancient texts as “sin”, but whether you understand it or not, exerting this type of dominance over another without their complete and informed consent defiles their sacred rights, and defiles your own testimony that you are walking in a “right” path before Spirit.

Oslo ~

It seems that this is proof that violence begets violence. This young man, in an insane concern for the multi-culturalization of his own country turned to extreme violence as an answer. When he had bombed the buildings and already killed, he then went to a youth camp to kill more. This time children, young people whom he considered the future leaders. 93 dead in the entire debacle. His purpose? To waken his people to the dangers of allowing the immigration of people of Islamic background. But the children he killed were Norwegian, not necessarily immigrants, not necessarily close to the source of his angst.

That, of course, is the difficulty with answering violence with violence. The people we hurt are usually not the ones that hurt us. The camp wasn’t of a religious nature, it was a Labor Party camp. Yes, he blames that party for the multicultural stance of his country, but these are not people that espouse violence in any way. Will his actions help his cause? Probably not, in fact, it may hurt it in many ways, and for years to come.

The violence that begat this violence is blamed on extremist Muslim jihadists, and because they claim the Islamic faith as their own, they taint the view of much or the world regarding the Muslims who truly see their faith as the House of Peace. There are, of course, things I am uncomfortable with, regarding the Islamic faith. I’ve never pretended otherwise. Devout women of the faith must wear the Burka and Hijab to cover themselves from head to toe. This engenders a lack of sexual responsibility among the men, as it’s “all right” to rape women whose skin is exposed. But, violence toward the peaceful practitioners of this faith is not going to make this go away, and the violence that was engendered wasn’t even toward Islamic folk, it was toward secular Norwegians.

Ouch! That’s the problem with answering violence with violence, those who get hurt, and in this case dead, are not the cause of the pain in the first place. If the violence did not spread like fireworks to injure others not involved, I am not sure any of us would do more than just stand back and let those involved fight it out. But, here is a prime example of the very explosiveness of such a stance. The violence that rocked Oslo was not a direct answer to Extremist Islam, it was an outpouring of angst on people only indirectly involved. And it was children who paid the price in this awful debacle.

It seems that no matter what side this is fought on, children are the targets, that is, itself, most frustrating. Why children? Is it because the soldiers and infighters in both extremes are nothing but cowards? They lack the balls to fight each other on equal ground, so kill the children? I have never had much patience with child killers, I have less now. The children are used to make us cringe, I know, and it is succeeding. I have come to believe that, whether extremist Islamist, or extremist anti-Muslim, the death penalty should ensue every time a child is raked into their fight.

Is Spanking Wrong?

I don’t know. I ask that question a lot. There doesn’t really seem to be an alternative that works with certain ages. I do feel that it should be a last resort, when you have tried all other avenues, as it should never feel like the first thing Mom or Dad will do if I make a mistake. In fact, it should not be an answer if it is truly a mistake. I did a little child rearing, with the daughter of a man I loved dearly, and was never certain that I did it “right”. So, this is not an article to give advice as much as raise the question. What I have seen in the generations since Spock first spoke against spanking is enough to make you wonder if that set of instructions was right for the children.

I don’t believe an actual “beating” ever does any good. The once or twice that I actually spanked the child I was helping with had more to do with what would happen if she repeated the actions for which she was spanked. The first was running across a busy road without looking. She nearly got run over at the point at which I spanked her, as much for running into the road when I told her not to,  and told her that had she gotten run over it would hurt much more than a spanking. The other time was when she kicked a playmate that was in her way. She had kicked her playmate in the eye, leaving a horrid bruise, and needed to know how much that hurt. I dare say the spanking hurt less than the bruised eye, but was enough to let her know that that was not acceptable behavior. At all other times, I preferred to use “time outs” or other means of expressing disapproval as I felt then, as I do now, that spankings were a last resort.

I do agree that violence often breeds violence, which is the argument against spanking to begin with, I simply felt that the only answer to her violence was to feel the consequences in a swift and effective way. One of my greatest concerns for this child that I loved as though she were my own, was that I wanted her to know that actions have consequences. I hope she learned that. And that is the rub, isn’t it? We never know that what we have tried to teach has actually been learned except with the living out of the life so affected. I know this hasn’t been an answer to the question, just a musing over what I did and whether it “worked”. I hope someday we will know the best and truest way to deal with each child so effectively that they will desire the way of love rather than the way of ruin.

In Memorium ~

Little Caylee Marie undoubtedly struck the hearts of citizens all over the world. There are many of us who would rather see the end of a life in the first trimester of pregnancy, before the quickening that means there is a chance that this little one would survive outside the uterus. If you make up your mind too late for an abortion that you do not want this child, then go to a legitimate adoption service, and let the child be reared by someone who loves and will love the child throughout it’s life. I cannot say whether Caycee Anthony murdered her two year old daughter, but the trial made it plain that she did not have a normal mother’s love for that baby. She didn’t even bother to feign grief for the little one she lost. It makes you ashamed to be of the same species.

But . . . . . .the fact of the matter is that she is not alone in her indifference. Children all over the world suffer at the hands of parents who should have given up their children for adoption to those who would care for them. There are way too many people who do care and would love to have a child of their own. Please, if your child proves too much for you to handle, don’t throw them away, let them be loved, let them be cared for, let them be nourished by those who would give them a good home!

Edit~ I just read where there was a lightning strike at the place where little Caylee’s body was dumped. If that means what I think it means, Caycee, or the child’s murderer will get justice, as that is the sign of the Native American Wakinyan. Let us watch and see!

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